Will Not See (Chautona Havig) – Review

~ About the Book ~

When Vikki Jeffries wakes up in a Rockland hotel with no idea of who she is and why she can’t remember… well, anything, the Rockland medical community begins to take a closer look at what may have happened to cause a second case of inexplicable amnesia.

But for Vikki, this is more than a medical anomaly–it’s her life. What is she doing in Rockland, thousands of miles away from her home in Apache Junction, Arizona? Who is she? Why is no one looking for her? Or are they?

The secrets of a past she’s discovering she doesn’t want to know lay locked away in a memory that refuses to acknowledge their existence.

When Brandon Marana finds his neighbor struggling to open her front door, his quiet life becomes a race to protect Vikki and himself from people who are determined to find her.

He’s falling in love with her–but he shouldn’t. He’s a Christian. She’s not. But the more she depends on him to know who she is and learn why these things keep happening to her, the stronger those ties become.

Will Not See: Sometimes, the past needs to stay there.

Genre:  Contemporary Christian Fiction
Release date:  29 August 2017
Pages:  340
Publisher:  Wynneword House

Amazon US  //  Amazon AU  //  Goodreads

~ Excerpt ~

A rush of air, antiseptic and cool, blasted her as she stepped through double automatic doors that opened to engulf her. Almost before she stated her purpose, a man behind the counter thrust a sign-in sheet at her. Half a second later, another clipboard followed. “Fill this out.”
Hands shaking, she stared at the sign-in sheet. A cold sweat broke out on her forehead. Rapid breaths filled her chest. Clinging to the desk, she rasped, “I can’t—”
“I can’t help you if you don’t sign in. Just—”
“I don’t know.”
This time, the man raised his eyes to meet her gaze. “Look, take a deep breath. What did you take?”
“Take?”
“We can’t help you,” he explained with excessive slowness, “if you don’t tell us. I’m not calling the cops, but if you don’t tell me what you took, we can’t get—”
Hands over her ears, she shook her head. “No, no, no. I didn’t take drugs. I don’t do drugs—” Panic returned as truth made her add, “I don’t think.”
“Let’s start with the basics, okay? I need your first name. Just your first—”
“I don’t know!” The second her words registered in her brain, her body revolted. Shaking, trembling, perspiration, chills—they hit hard, fast, and all at once. Again, she repeated the horrible words, whispered this time. “I don’t know.”
He reached for something under the counter. A blanket appeared—scentless, but comforting. “Put this around your shoulders. Take deep, slow breaths.”
[…]
Once the room quieted again, she stood before him, just as confused, just a bit less terrified. “Help me. I don’t know who I am. I don’t know where I am. I don’t know what’s happening to me!”
The guy pointed to her purse. “Is that yours?”
“I don’t know. The maid at the hotel thought so. She said to take it.” Her eyes widened. “What if it isn’t? What if I stole it?”
That thought overrode all attempts at controlling her emotions. Tears rolled down her face and splashed at her feet. Had she not willed herself to fight back, she’d have collapsed on the floor and wept. Instead, once more, she gripped the counter and tried to steady herself. “What do I do?”
[…]
The man behind the counter nodded at her purse. “Why don’t you see if you have identification in there? If it’s yours, you have to have something—a driver’s license, an ID, even a bill or letter would do.”
“But if it’s not mine?”
“Then we’ll find out. You found a purse. You look inside to find out whose it is. It’s what you do.”
As logical as the words sounded, one thought overrode them—a thought she refused to voice. Unless you stole it. Then you ditch the ID.
She dug for the wallet and shoved it across the counter. “You look. I can’t. Something about it freaks me out.”
Did he really move as slowly as it seemed? Each fraction of an inch took minutes—at least. But the counter guy took the wallet, flipped up the envelope-styled flap, and allowed the wallet to flop open. A flash of teeth. “Oh, it’s yours.” His smile grew as he added, “It’s nice to meet you, Victoria Jeffries. You’re a long way from home.”

~ Review ~

Can you imagine what it would be like to wake up and have no knowledge of who you are, and no memory of your life before that moment? That’s the premise behind this series, which began with None So Blind, and if you’re interested in this novel, I suggest you start there, because this story builds on some of the things that took place in the first novel.

I enjoyed the first novel in this series, but the addition of the suspense surrounding Vikki’s background had me doubly engrossed in this story. Waking up and not knowing who you are is one thing, but finding out someone is after you when you have no idea why is something else entirely! Not only is someone after Vikki, but there are stronger and stronger hints that these episodes of memory loss are somehow connected, and I can’t even begin to guess how that story line is going to develop. Bring on the next book, I say!

In the midst of this mystery, mayhem, and attempted murder, Vikki still needs to answer the question “Who am I?” and more importantly, “Who is God? And what does it mean to believe in Him?” The more she learns about her past, the more she struggles to understand Ella’s and Brandon’s faith. And I loved how authentic this struggle was, without providing pat or clichéd answers. It is very much a journey Vikki is still walking.

And Brandon. What a guy. He’s not superman, or even superhunk, but he’s loyal, loving in the deepest sense of the word, and not afraid of putting himself on the line for Vikki’s sake. Well, maybe he IS afraid, but he does it anyway! The romantic undercurrents are subtle, but there, simmering below the surface of their friendship. I can’t wait to see more.

As I said earlier, bring on the next book!

I received a copy of this novel from the author. This has not influenced the content of my review, which is my honest and unbiased opinion.

~ Other Books in the Series ~

~ Giveaway ~

To celebrate her tour, Chautona is giving away a grand prize of the None So Blind paperback, the Will Not See paperback, a Journaling Bible (Choice of KJV or NLT), Prismacolor Pencils, and a Christian Hymns Album!! Click below to enter. Be sure to comment on this post before you enter to claim 9 extra entries! https://promosimple.com/ps/bd17

~ About the Author ~

Author of the Amazon bestselling Aggie and Past Forward Series, Chautona Havig lives and writes in California’s Mojave Desert. With dozens of books to her name, Chautona spends most of her time writing, but when she takes the rare break, she can be found reading, sewing, paper crafting, or sleeping and dreaming of finishing the dozens of books swirling in her overly-active imagination at any given moment.

Connect with Chautona:  Website  //  Facebook  //  Twitter  //  Pinterest  //  Instagram

~ From the Author ~

The circle of death swirls on the screen and it shifts. The bank balance appears, and with it, my heart sinks. It’s been a tough few months, financially.  The bottom line proves it.

My reaction? Inhale. Exhale. “Okay, now we know the worst. We can do something about it.”

My husband, on the other hand, suffers a definite blow. Kevin might not sleep that night. Instead, he’ll mull over what we could have done differently, how we can make changes, if he’s a failure at this thing called life.  He’ll pray—for hours.

They say ignorance is bliss. And sometimes, that’s true. It’s also a personality thing, I think. I tend to be a “let me have your worst” kind of gal. But when the negative arrives, I also tend to want to shield Kevin from it all. I don’t know how he can worry so much.  He can’t fathom how I can turn it off.

But sometimes those personality things go deeper—into what can be serious faults.  It has been said,

“There are none so blind as those who will not see. The most deluded people are those who choose to ignore what they already know.” 

Or, in the words of Jeremiah,

“Now hear this, O foolish and senseless people, who have eyes but do not see, who have ears but do not hear.”

What does this have to do with not seeing?

As I work on the Sight Unseen series, one recurring theme happens, of course. Memory loss—the removal of all insight into one’s past.  You can hear who you were, be informed of what you did and why others think you did it, but you can’t know your own self the way you once did. It’s a fresh slate, and it can be a good thing in some respects.

Those around you can now see the difference between habits and personality traits—true dislikes and those conditioned by life. What might have been a fear once could be gone if the cause of that fear is blotted out.

But even for these fictional characters, truth doesn’t change. In None So Blind, Ella takes her memory loss and uses it as an opportunity to reinvent herself, if you will. And you know what?  If you asked her family about it, they’d tell you that it fits her personality.  That take-charge, gotta get ’er done attitude Dani may have used in different ways, but both “manifestations” of the woman had those qualities.  Sure, Ella’s was tempered by recent experience, but not much.

Vikki Jeffries, is almost the antithesis of Ella in that respect. 

The past is in the past. It scares her. Is it because she doesn’t know it?  Because she’s frightened by the unknown? We don’t know. But what we do know is anything associated with that past, even the few very personal items she finds, she rejects. It’s as if ignorance of them will protect her from them. Where Ella runs to face her problems, Vikki runs from them.

But despite those differences, I find it interesting that both women did the same thing, basically—just at different times.

Before her “episode,” Ella chose to blind herself to her faults.  She knew them. Lived with them daily, but couldn’t face or address them. So, she “refused to see.”

Vikki—we don’t know. But I think the story shows that she couldn’t blind herself to truth before her episode.  As much as she might have ached to, she just couldn’t. Now that the opportunity is here, however, she grasps it and if she insists on squeezing her eyes shut indefinitely, it may cost her everything—her life.  Her soul.

Philippians 4:8, “…whatever is true.”

They say ignorance is bliss.  Well, “they” also say, “Truth hurts.”  And sometimes it does. But so do the consequences of that ignorance.  I guess the next time the bank balance dips low, I won’t be handling the fallout alone.  Then again, one can always pray that it doesn’t dip low!  I think we’ll start there.

~ Tour Schedule ~

Tour Home Page

August 29: Just Jo’Anne  //  Carpe Diem
August 30: Seasons of Opportunities  //  Blogging With Carol  //  Lots of Helpers
August 31: Genesis 5020  //  Reading Is My SuperPower
September 1: Quiet Quilter  //  Back Porch Reads
September 2: Fiction Aficionado  //  Book Bites, Bee Sting, & Butterfly Kisses
September 3: A Reader’s Brain  //  Debbie’s Dusty Deliberations
September 4: Bigreadersite  //  The Scribbler
September 5: The Fizzy Pop Collection  //  Mommynificent
September 6: Christian Bookaholic  //  Moments Dipped in Ink  //  Margaret Kazmierczak
September 7: History, Mystery & Faith  //  Southern Gal Loves to Read
September 8: Pause for Tales  //  Avid Reader Book Reviews
September 9: Blossoms and Blessings  //  Reflections from my Bookshelves
September 10: A Baker’s Perspective  //  Pursuing Stacie
September 11: His Grace is Sufficient  //  Reader’s cozy corner